#B6 – Parrot Shoot

COR, I ‘AD A ‘OLE PATCH OF THESE SPRING UP OVERNIGHT LIKE IN ME GARDEN… TOOK AGES TO GET RID OF ‘EM AND THE SQUAWKING WAS UNBEARABLE.

“The Parrot Shoot eyes you suspiciously and react the same way it reacts to everything: by emitting a piercing shriek. You are paralyzed.”

#B5 – Plantpain

OH DEAR, I’VE SEEN THIS TYPE ‘O INJURY BEFORE I ‘AVE. BEST FING TO DO IS JUST TO WALK IT OFF… IF YE CAN WALK, THAT IS. HEH HEH.

“The Plantpain attempts to act, but can only curl up into a ball and weep gently.”

#B4 – Bag of Tricks

‘ELLO AGAIN THERE, GUV. THE ‘OL CULLER WHEEL  HERE AGAIN TO DO SOME DOUBLE DUTY THIS BATCH ‘O ‘UNDRED, IT WOULD SEEM. I FINK YOU KNOW THE DRILL BY NOW SO LET’S GET STARTED, EH?

DI’N’T WE SEE A BLOKE LIKE THIS NOT TOO LONG AGO? LAZY, IF YOU ASK ME! BUT THEN, NO ONE’S ASKIN ME, ARE THEY?

“The Bag of Tricks pulls a Game Over out of its pouch!… Just kidding.”

#479 – Rowbot

Turns out a boat with AI but no systems isn’t a great idea.

“The Rowbot calls for the Oarbots! …. but they don’t show up.”

#478 – Bakin’ Cheeseburger

He’s baking… buns?

“The Bakin’ Cheeseburger gives you delicious food! Your HP is restored… but your Artery Clog stat skyrockets.”

#477 – Jurass Ick

Scientists didn’t exactly jump at the chance to revive this from fossils.

“The Jurass Ick tries to use its vestigial arms… and fails!”

#476 – Banana Peelout

Maybe lay off the gas for a SECOND, dude. Sheesh.

“The Banana Peelout runs out of gas!”

#475 – Ferrous Wheel

First you roll, then you rust. Then you roll… and then you rust. Then you rust… and then you roll… and rust.

“The Ferrous Wheel rolls over the party! You all sustain squishing damage and need a tetanus shot.”

#474 – Skullk

Not actually all that stealthy.

“The Skullk tries to sneak over to you to steal your wallet, but bonks its head into your leg.”

#473 – Frame of Mind

If you’re looking for a good one, well… keep looking.

“The Frame of Mind is currently: Pessimistic! Destruction rains from the heavens.”