#256 – Timer Slime

He does this every night, but once a year everyone joins him for some reason.

“The Timer Slime is counting down! The countdown after this one will begin in 3, 2, 1…”

Happy New Year, everybody.

#255 – InvestiGator

If he doesn’t stop reading that ticker, he’s going to have problems with his other ticker.

“The InvestiGator opens his briefcase! The bad news overwhelms you and you pass out.”

#254 – Pet Peeve

Humankind sort of gave up halfway while domesticating these, so having a Pet Peeve, while extremely common, is still pretty annoying.

“The Pet Peeve is making an indescribable amount of noise. You run without realizing it.”

#253 – Catter Clysm

After the Catter Clysm, only those who bring the food will survive. Oh, and cockroaches, of course. They always survive this kind of thing.

“The Catter Clysm would call forth nuclear winter, but it doesn’t want to get cold! So, it bathes the battlefield in searing radioactive heat instead.”

#252 – Cursory Glance

Abandoned early on in the development of the graphical user interface; it would never point at anything, just look it over briefly before moving on.

“The Cursory Glance isn’t even watching where it’s going! It tumbles headlong into you and you take minor damage.”

#251 – Tannenbomb

Keep these watered, otherwise they’ll go up like a… well, yeah.

“The Tannenbomb is trying to fray its wiring and cause a spark! Moisture levels are critically low…”

Happy Holidays, everyone.

#250 – Toaster

To our health! And also to butter! … But not to landing butter-side down!

“The Toaster pops! A cork and a piece of burnt toast hit you in the face.”

#249 – Pair of Shades

These guys are so cool, they don’t even believe in ghosts.

“The Pair of Shades give you a smug, patronizing look. You are paralyzed.”

#248 – Pastriarch

He was baked first, and he will lead his brethren in the oven as well as he can.

“The Pastriarch distracts you with a creation myth about eggs and flour! You fall asleep.”

#247 – Micromanager

Hmm, this report is looking alright. Anyway, we’ve got a virus– he’s your 2:30 appointment.

“The Micromanager is scrutinizing your actions! You fumble your turn.”